A Canadian tourist has caused uproar on social media with his absolute lack of feeling towards Paris.
After spending a week in the notoriously polarising city, Michael Perrini declared on Facebook that “I had a pretty good time in Paris – not much to see or do but the people were fine,” to the utter disbelief of every other human being on the planet.
‘Nobody has EVER thought that,” wrote an incredulous BieberFan69 on a forum discussing the issue.
“There are only two Paris experiences. You either lock eyes with your true love while admiring the way the Eiffel Tower’s reflection dances off the Seine at sunset. OR you step in dog shit while a gang of disaffected youths mug you and leave you for dead in a gutter, only to be roused by a snooty waiter scalding you with a bland Americano that costs 7 euros. THOSE ARE THE ONLY TWO OPTIONS!”
Internet commentators panned Perrini’s mystifying assertion that “the sightseeing was unremarkable but the staff at the tourist information centre were friendly,” describing it as “ludicrous,” “clinically insane,” and “as far from the objective truth as possible.”
Inexplicably, his Facebook album of the trip failed to contain a single photo of the Eiffel Tower or Notre Dame. Instead, Perrini photographed the doorways to nondescript administrative buildings and took blurry snaps inside dimly lit metro carriages.
“This dude actually wrote ‘The food wasn’t great but the prices seemed fair,’” complained minge_buster_2damax. “WHAT? When you pay 32 euros for a dinner that contains 60 grams of actual food, you either think ‘That was the most flavoursome morsel that has ever graced my tastebuds’ or ‘What an absolute RIP OFF!’ Nobody is on the fence about this FFS!”
At the time of publication, Perrini had further infuriated his followers with another inexplicable post.
“I’m looking forward to a relaxing few days in Rome. But I guess as a city it doesn’t have much to offer on the history front.”