A groundbreaking study has found that asking “Voulez vous couchez avec moi ce soir?” to a French girl will get you laid almost every time.
Researchers at Sciences Po University in Paris found that the pick-up line – popularised by Christina Aguilera’s 2001 cover of Lady Marmalade – is the most effective way for intoxicated British tourists to get French girls into the sack.
“We ‘ave discovered zat zis lyric, ‘ow you say, drives ze French ladies wild wiss desire!” lead researcher Jean Dubois told The Tragic Traveller.
“Our research ‘as confirmed zat 96% of ze girls will stop whatever zey are doing and come back to your ‘ostel dorm as soon as you utter zese magical words.”
Dubois and his team believe the line – which translates as “Do you want to sleep with me tonight?” – is so potent because it combines a strong grasp of the language with the kind of unashamed sleaziness the French are famous for.
“We French people are so ‘appy when ze tourists try to speak our language,” Dubois said. “And when zey ask ‘Voulez vous couchez avec moi ce soir?’ in zeir thick Liverpool accent, well, it just makes us want to, ‘ow you say, fuck zeir brains out!”
The research team found that “Alright luv, how about I give you a French kiss south of the border” and “Want to munch on my six-inch baguette?” were also extremely effective pick-up techniques in France. However, the line “Can I marinate my escargot in your shell?” was considered on the nose, even by French standards.