Lovers embarking on first romantic getaway incorrectly believe everything will go great

A couple heading on their first romantic getaway mistakenly think they’ll get along just fine, The Tragic Traveller can reveal.

To celebrate their 7-weekiversary, Stacey Hopman and Dean Giorgio are about to embark on a 10-day holiday in Italy, where they have no idea how close they’ll come to strangling each other.

“He’s such a sweetie,” Stacey said of the man she would later refer to as “a good argument for abortion.”

Unaware that Dean clips his toenails in bed and gets drunk off two glasses of white wine, she added: “We get along so well. I just can’t wait to spend the trip of a lifetime with him.”

Dean, who is yet to endure Stacey’s two-hour “getting ready” ritual, told The Tragic Traveller he thought he’d found The One.

“I love Stacey so much. I can’t wait for us to take a corny couples photo in front of the Leaning Tower of Pisa,” he said, seemingly oblivious to the fact that his primary function on the romantic getaway would be to take bikini photos of Stacey for her Insta.

I think it’s adorable that she’s so picky about what she eats. I’m sure that won’t annoy me in any way while we’re travelling.

At press time, Dean and Stacey were having a friendly debate about whether they should visit the Sistine Chapel, unaware that this unresolved difference of opinion would end their relationship nine days later.

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