Tourists flock to admire Belgrade’s historical construction sites

It’s official: Belgrade’s collection of historical construction sites is the most impressive in the world.

New data shows that the Serbian capital is currently “renovating” every single one of its historical sites, and has been doing so for as long as anyone can remember. Tourists have begun to notice, visiting Belgrade in increasing numbers to photograph the city’s wealth of immaculate scaffolding, orange security tape, and temporary fencing.

“We can confidently say Belgrade has the oldest and best-preserved construction sites in the world,” Serbia’s tourism minister said. “Many of our historical construction sites have remained untouched for decades, right down to the last rusty tin of paint.”

When you visit one of our historical construction sites, you can guarantee not a single hammer has been lifted for at least 15 years.

Among Belgrade’s multitude of historical construction sites, Saint Sava Temple stands head and shoulders above the rest. The country’s largest orthodox church has been a work in progress since 1895, with construction beginning in 1935.

Against the backdrop of a historically important green plastic sheet, The Tragic Traveller interviewed an 81-year-old grandfather visiting the church with his grandchildren.

“Just think,” the man said as wiped a tear from his eye. “This building was under construction when I was born, and it’ll look exactly the same when my great-grandchildren are my age.”

“It’s so comforting to know that future generations will be able to admire this very scaffolding,” he added. “They’ll breathe in sawdust that’s older than they are. And they’ll mingle with the construction workers as they go outside for their twelfth cigarette break of the morning. It’s Serbia’s finest tradition.”

At publication time, every single construction worker in the city had just popped off to take their state-mandated 9 am shot of rakija.