Despite being in a village with a whopping two bars – one of which closes at 10 – a group of Mancunian backpackers at the Dong Mao Hostel in remote Vietnam have jumped on the Monday night drinks with glee.
Lee, who is 29, is foregoing the obligatory singlet and shorts for an upmarket button-up shirt and white chinos – exactly what he would wear when trying to impress in his beloved Manchester. However, this has left many confused as to why someone would dress up when going to a bar where the drinks are served in buckets.
“Who the fuck irons their shirt on a backpacking trip? It’s so weird,” one non-English observer said. “We’re just going to get some 50 cent beers and hang out by the lake. There’s zero reason to spend three hours getting ready.”
The phenomenon of English travellers wildly overdressing is well-documented. No matter the heat, location, or local economy, almost every British tourist will treat any drinking occasion as an excuse to break out the brogues or the fake tan. Unfortunately, most are blissfully unaware of how ridiculous they tend to look wearing Italian restaurant attire when everyone else is in elephant pants.
Stacey, 26, is in minute 160 of applying her foundation. “I don’t see the big deal. A night out is a night out. That’s why I’m going to wear £500 worth of clothing and heels to this bar where alcohol costs less than tap water.” Though aware she is holding up the whole group by insisting on “putting her face” on until 11 pm, she maintains that paying bridesmaid-level attention to her makeup is worth it.
“What if there’s some fit boys from exactly the same town as me at the bar? I can’t take that risk.”
The Tragic Traveller’s reporter on the scene has spotted the English group sitting in the corner away from the other nationalities, loudly singing football chants and sweating through their climate-inappropriate outfits.
More as this story develops.