Man gives hostel two-star review after it fails to provide en suite bathroom, pillow chocolate

A hostel in Prague is today reeling after receiving a scathing two-star review after not providing its guests with expected a complimentary buffet breakfast, room service, or even a pillow chocolate.

Douglas Pennybody – the 26-year-old heir to a London estate twice the size of Monte Carlo – recently found himself lodging at the Blazed Boar hostel after failing to locate even a single other option in the overcrowded Czech capital. He didn’t hold back on Hostel World after suffering through three nights at the thoroughly underwhelming hostel.

“Quite frankly, I was aghast that the establishment expected me to board with half a dozen vagabonds,” Pennybody told The Tragic Traveller. “I should never have left my man Willikins to arrange the booking. When I realised the daft bastard had signed me up for one of these so-called ‘dormitories,’ I gave him a stern talking to.”

For Pennybody, having to haul his luggage up the stairs after his half-hour limousine ride was an insult.

“I asked the concierge where the bloody bellboy was, but the fool didn’t seem to have a clue what I was talking about,” Pennybody complained. “The valet was nowhere to be seen, and I haven’t spotted a cleaning lady since I arrived.”

“For six quid a night, I’d expect better,” said Pennybody, who has no idea how much things cost because his daddy pays for everything.

Pennybody said the only reason he gave the hostel a two-star review instead of nothing was because he “smashed hella puss” on his last night in the dorm.

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