Queensland brickie gets some “culcha” in him at all-inclusive Bali resort

For his first overseas trip, 26-year-old Queensland brickie Jaydin Craddick is embarking on a “culchural advencha.” His desire to escape Australia has led him all the way to the Club Med resort in Bali, where he’s found himself among an entirely new crew of his lower-middle-class countrymen.

Wearing a Bintang singlet – on which he’d cleverly crossed out the “Bin” and replaced it with “Poon” – Jaydin spoke to The Tragic Traveller about his enlightening spiritual experience abroad.

“Mate, Bali’s fucken’ sick!” he said. “Everything’s cheap as and they’ve got this mad pool bar at the resort. I was neckin’ brews in me boardies ’til midnight last night. Heaps of birds too, ‘ey.”

Despite barely having set foot outside the resort, the bricklayer from Mackay seemed quite content to make sweeping statements about the Indonesian island’s culture and traditions.

“They have this really different attitude toward life, ya know?” a suddenly philosophical Jaydin said. “It’s like, in Australia we only care about work and mortgages and stuff. But these Balinese people … they’re like real chill. While all of us are gettin’ fucken’ loose, they’re just hangin’ out, waitin’ to drive us home in their taxis for like five bucks. It’s a real different culcha, ‘ey.”

“Also, Balinese food is mad,” he added. “I got this spicy chicken burger at Macca’s, it was heaps exotic. Yeah, I was fucken’ lovin’ it.”

At this point, Jaydin seemed to lose focus on the interview.

“Oi Damo, you seen this brekkie?” the Queensland brickie called out to his mate, who was in the process of pocketing a handful of mini butters from the buffet. “Fuck me dead, they’ve got a whole tray of hash browns. Get some of this in ya, dickhead!”