An overly eager man and his unimpressed sexual partner have failed to join the Mile High Club on a technicality.
Donny and his girlfriend of six days, Chantrelle, today embarked on a spontaneous getaway from Indiana to Kansas to celebrate the longest successful relationship either of them have ever been in.
Feeling frisky and looking to tick off a goal on their bucket list, the couple ran to the toilet at the first opportunity. Like many couples, they were hoping to join the Mile High Club.
However, an overly excited Donny climaxed just 16 seconds after the fasten seatbelt sign had been turned off. At that point, the plane had only reached an altitude of 0.61 miles (~1 km).
“It’s never normally like this,” a red-faced Donny said after the act. “I’ve just been under a lot of pressure lately… And you’re just so pretty, you know what I’m saying?”
Chantrelle, who seemed more embarrassed by Donny’s sexual incompetence than the fact she’s his first cousin, declined to comment.
Other passengers later overheard her assuring Donny that a lot of guys she knows – like, several hundred – have the same problem.