The Tragic Traveller

The Tragic Traveller

Our travel bug is fatal

  • Culture shock
  • Making memories
  • Fanny pack
  • Miles high
  • After dark

beach

Tropical destinations to avoid bushfires
FEATURED MAKING MEMORIES NEWS 

4 heavenly tropical destinations where you can shirk your duty as the leader of a burning nation

December 19, 2019December 19, 2019 The Tragic Traveller 0 Comments Australia, beach, bushfires, Hawaii, holiday, national emergency, natural disaster, Scott Morrison, tropical destination

If you want to leave the bushfires behind so you can get lit in paradise, we’ve scouted four of the best tropical destinations for you.

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CULTURE SHOCK FEATURED 

Brexit may force British tourists to interact with a local for once in their fucking lives

September 30, 2019September 30, 2019 Paul Norman 1 Comment beach, Brexit, British tourists, Greece, holiday, Italy, Mediterranean, Spain

Thanks to the general neediness pervasive among English tourists in particular, the EU’s freedom of movement provision was vital to the industry.

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CULTURE SHOCK FANNY PACK NEWS 

Traveller with zero interest in children suddenly super keen to teach English to Thai kids

September 16, 2019September 16, 2019 Paul Norman 0 Comments beach, kids, language, teaching English, TEFL, TESL, Thailand, work and travel

Never had Amanda even talked about kids until two weeks ago, when she signed a lucrative year-long contract to teach English to Thai kids.

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Beginner surfer wiped out by almighty Neptune
FEATURED NEWS 

Almighty Neptune sends thunderous wave to wipe out beginner surfer who dared enter his domain

July 10, 2019July 10, 2019 Paul Norman 0 Comments beach, beginner, fury, god, Neptune, surfing, wipeout, working holiday

Max Weber, a plucky 21-year-old beginner surfer from swell-starved Dusseldorf, had been learning to ride the waves while on a working holiday in Japan. Now he’s been forced back to dry land by the god of the sea.

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CULTURE SHOCK FEATURED 

“FUCK OFF, TOURISTS!” screams crusty old local surfing at most famous beach in the world

June 27, 2019June 27, 2019 Paul Norman 1 Comment angry, annoying, beach, Hawaii, local, surf, tourists

A leathery old local surfer native to Hawaii turned some heads today as he poured on the heat at some day-trippers choosing to surf at his beloved Waikiki Beach.

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FEATURED MAKING MEMORIES 

Clearly unstable stock photo model experiences wild mood swings during brief trip to the beach

June 25, 2019June 25, 2019 The Tragic Traveller 0 Comments beach, Brazil, crazy, emotions, photo, stock photo model, unstable

A stock photo model who is clearly suffering from some form of multiple-personality disorder has scared the shit out of her photographer with her uncontrolled mood swings during a 15-minute photo shoot on the beach.

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Booze-fuelled holiday in Phuket
AFTER DARK CULTURE SHOCK 

Crippling existential crisis solved by booze-fuelled Phuket holiday

May 27, 2019May 27, 2019 The Tragic Traveller 0 Comments alcoholism, beach, compensation, drinking, existential crisis, holiday, Phuket, sadness, Thailand

A man who has spent almost all his life grappling with the torment of his own existence has banished his spiritual demons by taking a fucken’ sick 10-day bender in Phuket.

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FEATURED MAKING MEMORIES NEWS 

Thousands of holidays ruined by Great Social Media Outage of 2019

April 14, 2019April 14, 2019 The Tragic Traveller 0 Comments beach, communication, Facebook, Insta model, Instagram, internet, selfie, social media, tragedy, WhatsApp

Hundreds of thousands of tourists around the world are today in mourning after their holidays were ruined by the Great Social Media Outage of 2019.

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Hack takes your trip to Spain
FEATURED MAKING MEMORIES 

Hacker who just stole your identity can’t wait to take your trip to Spain

April 7, 2019April 7, 2019 The Tragic Traveller 0 Comments beach, Hacker, holiday, identity theft, relax, sangria, Spain, trip

The hacker who minutes ago took complete control of your identity is looking forward to enjoying your upcoming trip to Spain.

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FEATURED MAKING MEMORIES 

“But am I really happy?” wonders travel influencer after Cancun photo notches up 10,000th like

March 6, 2019March 6, 2019 The Tragic Traveller 0 Comments beach, bikini, Cancun, existential crisis, Insta model, Instagram, Nietzsche, philosophy, selfie, travel

A travel influencer has reached a moment of existential crisis despite getting a record 10,000 likes on her most recent

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FEATURED MAKING MEMORIES NEWS 

Your bikini selfie only got 13 likes therefore this whole holiday is a disaster

October 15, 2018November 22, 2018 The Tragic Traveller 2 Comments beach, bikini, Cancun, Instagram, selfie, social

The fact that only 13 people have reacted to the bikini selfie you posted two days ago means this whole

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NEWS

Somali government advises against travel to US
CULTURE SHOCK FEATURED NEWS 

Somali government warns citizens against travelling to the USA

May 30, 2020 The Tragic Traveller 0

In response to out-of-control scenes in the US over the past few days, the Somali government has made the unprecedented move of advising its citizens to stay away from the world’s richest country.

30-year-old backpacker and travel blogger wants to make money
FEATURED MAKING MEMORIES NEWS 

30-year-old backpacker’s fear of no longer travelling or having a social life proven correct

April 20, 2020 The Tragic Traveller 0
Chernobyl is on fire
FEATURED MAKING MEMORIES NEWS 

Chernobyl catching fire somehow not even in the 10 most apocalyptic news stories of 2020

April 14, 2020 The Tragic Traveller 0
Conscientious full-time backpacker starts travelling from home
FEATURED MAKING MEMORIES NEWS 

Conscientious full-time backpacker starts travelling from home

March 24, 2020 The Tragic Traveller 0

PERSPECTIVE

Waiting for roommates to stop
AFTER DARK CULTURE SHOCK PERSPECTIVE 

OPINION: If my roommates don’t shut up soon, I’ll have no choice but to sit here silently and wait for them to stop

December 18, 2019 Paul Norman 0

My only option is to press the nuclear button: to continue to do nothing and seethe silently until they shut up.

WTF? I arrived in London five hours ago and now I have no money left
FANNY PACK FEATURED PERSPECTIVE 

WTF? I arrived in London five hours ago and now I have no money left

September 12, 2019 The Tragic Traveller 0
OPINION: Why millennials should spend less on travel and more on my $500 online e-consulting course
FANNY PACK FEATURED PERSPECTIVE 

OPINION: Why millennials should spend less on travel and more on my $500 online e-consulting course

August 7, 2019 Paul Norman 0
I live in a tent
FANNY PACK PERSPECTIVE 

Congratulations on buying your first home! I live in a tent

May 3, 2019 The Tragic Traveller 0

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The Tragic Traveller is the world’s most respected – albeit only – source of travel-based satire. Almost everything you’ve seen on this site is completely made up and, frankly, you’re a fool if you believe a word of it.

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