The Tragic Traveller

The Tragic Traveller

Our travel bug is fatal

  • Culture shock
  • Making memories
  • Fanny pack
  • Miles high
  • After dark

holiday

FEATURED MILES HIGH 

Wistful Scott Morrison types “Maldives” into Skyscanner

January 8, 2020January 8, 2020 The Tragic Traveller 0 Comments bushfires, holiday, Maldives, politics, Scott Morrison, tropical destination

After literal days of work, Australian Prime Minister Scott Morrison is bushed and could really do with a tropical holiday.

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Tropical destinations to avoid bushfires
FEATURED MAKING MEMORIES NEWS 

4 heavenly tropical destinations where you can shirk your duty as the leader of a burning nation

December 19, 2019December 19, 2019 The Tragic Traveller 0 Comments Australia, beach, bushfires, Hawaii, holiday, national emergency, natural disaster, Scott Morrison, tropical destination

If you want to leave the bushfires behind so you can get lit in paradise, we’ve scouted four of the best tropical destinations for you.

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Hungover ski-lift operator keeping you safe
FEATURED MILES HIGH 

Report: Only person stopping you from falling to your death is hungover Australian ski-lift operator

November 27, 2019November 27, 2019 Paul Norman 1 Comment danger, drunk, health and safety, holiday, hungover, mountain, skiing, winter

There’s one group of people who will stand on the frontlines and keep skiers and their families safe while still kinda tipsy: Aussies on working holidays.

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CULTURE SHOCK FEATURED 

Brexit may force British tourists to interact with a local for once in their fucking lives

September 30, 2019September 30, 2019 Paul Norman 1 Comment beach, Brexit, British tourists, Greece, holiday, Italy, Mediterranean, Spain

Thanks to the general neediness pervasive among English tourists in particular, the EU’s freedom of movement provision was vital to the industry.

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Not working during trip to France
FANNY PACK FEATURED 

Local woman successfully convinces boss she’ll be working during her two-week trip to France

August 13, 2019August 14, 2019 The Tragic Traveller 0 Comments cheese, France, girls trips, holiday, lying, wedding, wine, working holiday

A London office worker has today pulled off the ultimate heist, convincing her boss that she’ll be “working remotely” during her two-week trip to France.

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CULTURE SHOCK NEWS 

Study: People who pronounce it “Fronce” are the absolute worst

July 30, 2019August 1, 2019 The Tragic Traveller 0 Comments France, holiday, Paris, research, stories, study, travel wanker

It’s official: That colleague who pronounces it “Fronce” is just the fucking worst, a new study has found. Researchers from

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FANNY PACK FEATURED 

Holidaying Balkan politician generously tips Greek waiter with €10 he stole from his own citizens

July 1, 2019July 1, 2019 The Tragic Traveller 0 Comments Balkans, corruption, Greece, holiday, luxury, money, politician, Serbia

A Balkan politician who’s been working hard all year to launder public funds has paid it forward by generously tipping his waiter using his citizens’ money during a luxury holiday in Mykonos.

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FANNY PACK FEATURED MAKING MEMORIES 

Four-year-long holiday cut short by family member selfishly getting married

June 12, 2019June 12, 2019 Paul Norman 0 Comments Bali, holiday, marriage, ruined, selfish, wedding

An Italian national living in Bali woke up several of his neighbours this morning when he received a Facebook message from his sister.

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Office drone on holiday drinks light beer
AFTER DARK FEATURED 

Office drone on first holiday in eight years treats self to a single light beer at hotel bar

June 11, 2019June 11, 2019 The Tragic Traveller 0 Comments beer, break, business, drugs, holiday, Iowa, Midwest, stress, work, working holiday

An Australian man who has worked tirelessly throughout his twenties to get ahead on the corporate ladder has tonight drowned nearly a decade’s worth of stress with a single Miller Light beer, The Tragic Traveller can confirm.

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Booze-fuelled holiday in Phuket
AFTER DARK CULTURE SHOCK 

Crippling existential crisis solved by booze-fuelled Phuket holiday

May 27, 2019May 27, 2019 The Tragic Traveller 0 Comments alcoholism, beach, compensation, drinking, existential crisis, holiday, Phuket, sadness, Thailand

A man who has spent almost all his life grappling with the torment of his own existence has banished his spiritual demons by taking a fucken’ sick 10-day bender in Phuket.

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Hack takes your trip to Spain
FEATURED MAKING MEMORIES 

Hacker who just stole your identity can’t wait to take your trip to Spain

April 7, 2019April 7, 2019 The Tragic Traveller 0 Comments beach, Hacker, holiday, identity theft, relax, sangria, Spain, trip

The hacker who minutes ago took complete control of your identity is looking forward to enjoying your upcoming trip to Spain.

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This man runs 10 km every morning
FEATURED MAKING MEMORIES 

Sociopath runs 10 km every morning even when he’s on fucking holiday

March 5, 2019March 5, 2019 The Tragic Traveller 0 Comments exercise, health, holiday, Instagram, lifestyle, psychopath, running, social media, sociopath, Strava, travel

A man who runs 10 km every morning despite being on holiday must have something seriously fucking wrong with him,

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  • ← Previous

NEWS

Somali government advises against travel to US
CULTURE SHOCK FEATURED NEWS 

Somali government warns citizens against travelling to the USA

May 30, 2020 The Tragic Traveller 0

In response to out-of-control scenes in the US over the past few days, the Somali government has made the unprecedented move of advising its citizens to stay away from the world’s richest country.

30-year-old backpacker and travel blogger wants to make money
FEATURED MAKING MEMORIES NEWS 

30-year-old backpacker’s fear of no longer travelling or having a social life proven correct

April 20, 2020 The Tragic Traveller 0
Chernobyl is on fire
FEATURED MAKING MEMORIES NEWS 

Chernobyl catching fire somehow not even in the 10 most apocalyptic news stories of 2020

April 14, 2020 The Tragic Traveller 0
Conscientious full-time backpacker starts travelling from home
FEATURED MAKING MEMORIES NEWS 

Conscientious full-time backpacker starts travelling from home

March 24, 2020 The Tragic Traveller 0

PERSPECTIVE

Waiting for roommates to stop
AFTER DARK CULTURE SHOCK PERSPECTIVE 

OPINION: If my roommates don’t shut up soon, I’ll have no choice but to sit here silently and wait for them to stop

December 18, 2019 Paul Norman 0

My only option is to press the nuclear button: to continue to do nothing and seethe silently until they shut up.

WTF? I arrived in London five hours ago and now I have no money left
FANNY PACK FEATURED PERSPECTIVE 

WTF? I arrived in London five hours ago and now I have no money left

September 12, 2019 The Tragic Traveller 0
OPINION: Why millennials should spend less on travel and more on my $500 online e-consulting course
FANNY PACK FEATURED PERSPECTIVE 

OPINION: Why millennials should spend less on travel and more on my $500 online e-consulting course

August 7, 2019 Paul Norman 0
I live in a tent
FANNY PACK PERSPECTIVE 

Congratulations on buying your first home! I live in a tent

May 3, 2019 The Tragic Traveller 0

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The Tragic Traveller is the world’s most respected – albeit only – source of travel-based satire. Almost everything you’ve seen on this site is completely made up and, frankly, you’re a fool if you believe a word of it.

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